Father John Misty Excommunicated By The Catholic Church

Sad news for fans of both Father John Misty and Catholicism; this past weekend, the artist known as Father John Misty (Joshua Tillman), was excommunicated by the Catholic Church, following three formal cease and desist letters presented by leading church officials. Typically, the Catholic Church would not offer many official warnings, but Tillman’s considerable contributions to theological philosophy have placed him in a favorable light in the eyes of the papacy. 

November 2016, after delivering Saturday evening mass, Father John Misty returned to his home in for a night of songwriting and confessionals. Sources tell us that the two activities became unwittingly entangled, and the received confessions allegedly influenced lyrics that would soon become tracks on his 2017 release, Pure Comedy. According to church officials, this is not the first time Tillman’s career has affected his songwriting. The aforementioned cease and desist letters were sent shortly after the release of I Love You, Honeybear, after multiple members of Tillman’s church claimed that stories in the song reflected actual life events. 

According to Tillman’s neighbors, he responded to such letters by burning them in his back yard, each one strapped to an effigy of a musician that Tillman felt had “been engulfed by the mediocre beast of entertainment, a beast that enters our ears, viciously consumes our remaining brain cells, and lets us bleed into fiery numbness.” After, neighbors report he would bring a mic stand outside, hook it up to speakers he had hidden throughout the neighborhood, and perform the first three chapters of George Orwell’s 1984 accompanied by a live percussionist. 

Neighbors report that after receiving the letter declaring his excommunication status, Tillman quietly installed twelve more speakers throughout the neighborhood; yet, no neighbors have reported hearing Tillman’s signature performances since. One neighbor claimed to have heard whimpering over the speakers between the hours of 3:00 am and 4:00 am, but these claims remain unconfirmed. 

Tillman’s former seminary teacher, who has decided to remain anonymous, responded to the news of Tillman’s excommunication in disbelief: “I never thought he would keep up with music. He just wasn’t that good as a kid… now you’re telling me he made it big? That’s unbelievable.” 

Whether or not Tillman will change his stage name remains unknown. 

The Lord has not responded to interview requests.

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